I'm not a writer by profession so I feel silly when I say I've got a bad case of writer's block. Inspiration that once came easily and fluidly now takes a lot of work and energy. I used to be able to observe a scenario, think of an idea and then write about it, linking it to the various things my thought process goes through.
I even second-guess my sentence constructions now and it's not looking pretty.
I'd blame it on insomnia. Insomnia plays a huge part in my life. I use the word loosely, and I'm not medically an insomniac. No amount of exercise can actually make me collapse earlier than midnight - I'd still be too mentally stimulated and craving to put in some time for music inspiration, music arrangements, Korean study, catching up on the news etc, or even my last resort to tire myself - playing various versions of Candy Crush until I have no more (game) lives.
My eye bags have been a permanent resident on my face, and I guess a gloomy, sallow face does nothing for your popularity but I've never regretted my lifestyle. I've been working to normalise my lifestyle after starting life as a working adult - i.e. eating healthier some times a week and trying to exercise? It sounds like a feeble attempt, but I like to start with baby steps so I don't get sick of "trying to be healthy" so quickly. I don't find being healthy cool or anything - if I do it, I promise you it's just for longevity. Haha.
Anyway, I decided to write this to check in with the small number of faithful readers that I have. I am honoured to see the views on certain posts to be unexpectedly high (for my writing standard), and some of you even left messages on certain posts - so sweet of you guys! If in any way, I have inspired you or provoked you to proactively choose to be, say, happier or more true to yourself, or more gracious towards people, yay. One life inspired by my random ramblings is good enough for me. I also hope that some of my photography managed to make your day a little more colourful and that you enjoyed my post-holiday photo-heavy posts.
As you all know, I tend to take a confessional approach in my writing - straight honesty and opinions that come from the heart/mind - and I don't necessarily enjoy pretentious stuff, any kind of it. Writing can be very fluffy and big vocabulary can be distracting, but I try my very best to write with vocabulary that very purely communicate what I am really trying to say at each point in time. In the social media digital landscape that we find ourselves in right now, I think many times the essence of what we mean to say gets lost in 'translation' and get seriously misinterpreted. So that sucks, but-
Moving on, I've been working on some audio tracks with a guitarist and learning how to control my breathing and air-release (whatever that is called). I'm definitely learning to refine my vocal delivery and in a nutshell, up my game? No matter what, singing's always an avenue of release for me but to be totally honest, my first love's probably experimental dabbling and adding depth and fullness to clean arrangements --- much, much more than singing lead in anything.
Check out the latest track below (live) and HERE to hear what I've been up to:
Every day's a day to learn and improve so imma keep going.
With that, I end off!
I'll leave my engagement stuff to, well, the next time. (Yeap. I'm engaged!)
Love, and more,
Louisa
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